About Us

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Detroit, Michigan, United States
Mr. & Mrs. Swanilla are a fun-loving, sexually adventurous couple that are enjoying a sexy secret, Living in the Lifestyle. We are part of the daily grind of kids, careers, coffee, dishes, wine, soccer games, & parent/teacher conferences. So come the weekend, we love to get our kids into bed early, and then run to our bedroom, drink wine and connect on every level. We have been married for over 20 years, and we are incredibly happy, deeply in love and still very hot for each other! We have never considered ourselves vanilla by the traditional meaning, but more like Dirty Vanilla or Sensual Swingers + Dirty Vanilla = 'Swanilla’! We both appreciate how sexy women can be, making sexy connections with couples and that the lifestyle allows us to explore fantasies, create new ones and make sexy friendships along the way. We have always been very erotic and wild and enjoy many things the lifestyle has to offer as it enhances an already great sex life! Be sure to follow our blog to see where our journey takes us! Look for #SexySwanilla for fun & sexy Tweets

Saturday, December 20, 2014

Our First Halloween Lifestyle Party

Some Treats & a few Tricks......

Seeing how it is almost Christmas, we figured it was good to post about our first Halloween party at a Lifestyle club. We actually had this post ready to go in draft mode, but life took over before we could add a few pics & edit it before we sent it out.

As we made our way into fall a few months ago we started talking about possibly attending our first lifestyle Halloween party. 

As we reviewed our calendar and talked about what it may be like we started getting very excited.  We knew we wanted to attend the same club that we have before – The X Club in Toronto for a few different reasons, mainly being familiar with the place and being comfortable. Knowing that Halloween is the biggest party in the lifestyle community we were excited and a little nervous. First was to decide what we were going to dress as. We looked at some very hot outfits online and decided to go as a Sexy Flight attendant & Captain! I was Captain Hugh Jorgan per my name tag!
Not Mrs. Swanilla but her costume!

We arrived at our hotel and noticed a few other couples arriving about the same time. Many just had that 'look' that they were attending the Halloween party! As we were checking in, the hotel staff was helping another couple and they said out loud "Oh you're here for the Halloween party, have fun tonight!" Once we settled in and relaxed for a bit we had our pre-game conversation about what the evening could bring. Again, never any expectations with each other but it's always nice to have that time to bring up the what if's, to make sure we are both on the same page for the evening.  We knew we were in for a treat when we left our hotel room and headed for the lobby to grab limo service to the club. At first Mrs. Swanilla thought she may be a little revealing in her sexy flight attendant costume. Once we were in the lobby and saw fellow club goers in their sexy costumes, that all went away! There were plenty of others that were revealing a lot more, that had a lot of confidence and playfulness. As we waited for about 15 minutes with others, we chatted with a few other couples. There were probably 15-20+ couples waiting in the lobby. Everyone was so nice and approachable. It just seemed very normal to be waiting with others that were all like minded people, regardless of their comfort level that were just dressed sexier than normal. In reality there wasn't a lot of lifestyle talk while waiting. Some dirty jokes, sexual/dirty comments among friends, along with drinks flowing and laughing. Honestly, we felt very comfortable.
Not Mr. Swanilla 

The week of the party we realized there was an annual event in Toronto called the Everything to do with Sex Show (ETDWSS).  http://everythingtodowithsex.com/  Twitter @The_Sex_Show 

We were bummed we found out about it so late as we would have loved to tweak our trip so we could have been there for 1-2 full days to enjoy the show. They had a wide range of sex products, seminars on various topics with celebrities such as the lovely Jessica O’Reilly (from Sex with Jess & Playboy’s Swing) as well as Michael & Holli from Playboy's SWING. Being on twitter a lot we noticed some tweets from Michael and Holli that they could be at the X-Club as they were at The X-Club booth at the Sex show.

Sure enough, the minute we walk into the club, right at the bar is Michael & Holli. We said hello and introduced ourselves, told them we enjoyed the show Swing very much and how the show has helped us learn and grow into where we are now. They were impressed we drove from Michigan for the party and said ‘that is dedication!' They were both very nice and approachable and it was fun having them be the emcee's/guest hosts for the big event. There was an area that night with the X-Club logo that you could take pics with them or other sexy couples to have fun with the various costumes. We chose not to take any pics for many reasons, but mainly we enjoy being discreet. 

Michael & Holli 
As we made away around the club it was just a sea of sexy people! From the staff to the guests just a lot of sexy costumes and people. We noticed a hot woman probably in her late 20's dressed as a unicorn. Once we realized what she was dressed as we looked at each other and were like "niiice!!!" There were a few costumes that made us scratch our heads a little. Saw a few guys dressed with lots of blood and a monster theme. Nothing sexy or attractive about it all and we were unsure on the thought behind that. We noticed a few couples that looked scared and very nervous to be there. If anyone is ever unsure if they should attend a lifestyle club we would recommend Halloween not being your first time. It just seems to be a lot to take in for a first timer. 

After we grabbed a drink we noticed a few couples near the photo area. So we started chatting with a few couples and one asked us how long we had been in the lifestyle. They like us have been dipping their toes in for a couple years and learning their comfort levels. They were fun to talk to and told us how they ended up at Lifestyle party near U of M while in Michigan.  So if the Buffalo, NY couple are reading this, drop us a line, it would be fun to stay in touch.

After we chatted with a few people, we decide to head to the dance floor. The place was packed and we had a great time on the dance floor!!! We both danced and really enjoyed being so close and physical with each other on the dance floor that it became incredibly sexy – even for the two of us! We were able to leave our daily lives behind for a nice evening and just connect in a sexy way. That's what it is about anyway. Having a great time with each other in a sexy environment and if something else happens or an opportunity is upon us/presents itself, then we would take it from there. 

Overall, we had one of the best times in terms of being with each other, dancing, and talking to a lot of people. It felt so comfortable and familiar to be there and just approach people and have them approach us. Halloween is so much easier to do this, as people compliment each other’s costumes all night so it’s a quick ice breaker “I love your costume!” can naturally turn into “is this your first Halloween party here?” to “How long have you been in the LS?” to ‘We’ll find you on the dance floor in a few minutes”.

After a little bit as we were on the dance floor having a great time, Mrs. Swanilla looked at me and said “would you like to go to the back?” I was somewhat surprised as it was earlier than I thought we would. We headed to the back and I was up for the open play area so we could be seen and watch several others or a private room. I was down for either and told Mrs. Swanilla to choose what she was comfortable with at the time.

Now at this club, if you go to the open area, you head to the locker room first, strip down to a towel and head to the open play area. If you get a private room, you can change in your room. So sometimes you may see couples with little to no clothes on while they make their way to the open play area or fully dressed as they make their way to a private room. We had never been to a private room alone as a couple. The last time we were in a private room, it was with another couple. Read about that experience here (New Experiences)

We started to get undressed and started kissing on the bed. Now remember, when the door is closed it is closed for a reason, even if you are in a room with a window. As I started to go down on Mrs. Swanilla she was still in her costume and enjoying it. After a few minutes we switched and she was going down on me. I whispered to her as a few sexy couples slowly walked by, they were watching. This really turns us on and gets us hot. Knowing that other ‘couples’ are watching and getting turned on by us. A few minutes later as we started to fuck – I had her bent over the bed and took her from behind. As we were enjoying ourselves, we noticed these two guys walk by. Then a minute later they came back and were watching/staring in a less than hot way and we noticed some obscene gestures, facial expressions, etc. – needless to say it killed the mood! Mrs. Swanilla had a minor freak out/ WTF moment when these douche bags were staring and left what seemed like an eternity later. She apologized to me and said “I can’t do this with these guys here”. I told her it was okay and just to calm down. She knew I had her back. Before we decided to call it, she calmed down and asked me if I would like a blowjob? Since I was ‘ready’ to go, I wasn't going to turn her down!!! She gave a great blowjob and had her back turned to the window. After we finished we got dressed and took a few minutes to focus on ourselves in our room, talk for a few minutes and just bring our smiles back. We decided to go out, grab a drink and just dance some more.

Tricks - not Treats!

As far as the two douche bags, we weren't exactly sure if they were there alone (single males) and thought it would be fun to go watch people in the lifestyle fuck? They both were fully dressed and we didn't see any women with them. So they may have each had a girlfriend or spouse they were with, but it seems highly unlikely. It seems many guys would act more classy and polite if they had their spouse/date on their arm while they watched. Not all, but just seems that has been our experiences.

After we grabbed a drink and were on the dance floor, we noticed a couple that we had smiled with earlier in the night. He was dressed as a scuba diver and we just chatted for a bit on the dance floor. They were such a nice couple. They were from there in Toronto and we talked about traveling in the lifestyle. He and I were cracking jokes within minutes of chatting. They told us they had been to lifestyle clubs and resorts in Vegas, Florida and Desire of course. I told him we were looking into Vegas as I wanted to take Mrs. Swanilla there for her birthday next year. They asked us how old we were, and their response was “you guys are in your thirties? You look so good, what do you eat?”  My response was ‘each other, as much as possible’!!!

They were such a fun a couple to talk to, that it felt very natural and fitting to talk to. We never had a moment where we thought it would lead to something else with them, but they were just nice to talk to and honestly, if we lived closer to them, they seem like a cool couple to stay in touch with. Grab a drink with, crack dirty jokes with without having to worry if you would offend someone with a sexually charged joke. I told them about our twitter & blog here so if you guys are reading this be sure to message us and say hello! 

At this point the dance floor was heating up very nicely. We were going to grab another drink and noticed a small crowd/jam off to the side of the dance floor. As we got closer, we noticed a hot lady standing on the dance floor with a very sensual look on her face as she was looking down. Turns out, another girl was on her knees going down on her on the dance floor as the two guys held her up. Not one to shy away from something, we decided to walk by slowly as we both enjoyed the view!

We danced and got so hot for each other that about an hour or so later, the mood struck again and I asked Mrs. Swanilla if she was interested in heading to the back again? So we headed to the back and this time got a private room without a window. We both loved being in private at this point and it was nice to reconnect after a less than hot experience just a little earlier. So as we started playing, we could hear everyone in rooms next to ours as well as the open play area next to us. Having mirrors all around us was really hot as well! We fucked and we fucked hard! Mrs. Swanilla looked great with a little of her costume still on while being 99% naked! It was such a different experience compared to earlier in the night and it also showed what the right environment and situation can play a role in a fun time! Even with each other, as you don’t always have to play with others or even make your way to the open area. It is okay to just have a fun and hot night with each other and let others hear you screaming and moaning as you have multiple orgasms!

We did notice that as the night progressed we noticed a couple that were pursuing another couple on the dance floor. Sometimes if you don't find that connection or just aren't looking for anyone else that night, it is fun to just watch how others interact. From both a sexual and lifestyle perspective - almost a way to take some mental notes for your own use someday. In a vanilla club it is so prevalent and common to be hit on as everyone there is single for the most part. If someone hits on a woman that is taken, things could usually lead to guys arguing or turning into alpha males. However, we have always thought it is not only a compliment to be hit on, but the fact that others find us attractive, sexy or even fuckable is also a turn on for us. If a guy (or lady) tells Mrs. Swanilla that she looks sexy and compliments her, I don't see that as a threat. It's all how you present the compliment though. In a sexy and classy way. I would be more skeptical if we were at a vanilla dance club and a guy hit on her. Just something about a lifestyle club where there are more manners, a little more class. Maybe many lifestyle friendly couples have been listening to a lot of lifestyle podcasts or reading blogs have picked up on how to behave?!?!

As we noticed this couple flirting with another couple, they were grinding/dancing and noticed the two girls were kissing, then the couples were kissing their different partners. So it was hot to see things progress with them. However, out of nowhere three people (two girls and a guy) more or less pushed their way into the 4-some/flirting/kissing on the dance floor, to where the two new girls were kissing one of the original girls, and the other couple were whispering and had a look on their face like "what just happened". So we aren't sure if they cock-blocked them, or it was all welcoming and lead to perhaps a more-some in the back. But from our perspective it looked like a mood kill. 

As we got back to our room, we were exhausted and got into bed about 2:30am. We were awoken at 4:30am to our neighbors just moaning in a nice and sexy way. We could hear them starting out and next thing we knew, we just hear her screaming and their bed just going crazy!!! Knowing our floor was full of sexy swingers this wasn't at all surprising. On our way out a few hours later we noticed a sexy pair of fuck me shoes in front of their door! 


Kind of goes with the “you know you are at a swingers party when……..”

The next morning we got ready and grabbed some breakfast at the hotel. I didn't realize it at the time, but there was a couple that we had chatted with night before a few tables away as we were finishing up. I only knew them with their costumes on but Mrs. Swanilla recognized who they were. We didn't approach them as everyone looked a little rough the next day and we were just 15 minutes from leaving for a 4+ hour car ride back home to Michigan. But they seemed nice and who knows, maybe they are reading this!?!

The following day it was very surreal. The drive home was very enjoyable, listening to some fun podcasts, some lifestyle based and some others we enjoy. We had great weather, no bad traffic, and sacrificed sleep to get home faster. However, as we slipped into our normal vanilla lives when we got home, there was such a nice afterglow. Just being among other people and the public in general at local event that day, it was nothing but smiles on our faces and thinking about our fun night. Looking at other couples and whispering to each other "You think they are in the LS?" or our simple version "Look to your left would or wouldn't?" when we see someone that is hot!

Our 'weapons' for a fun weekend!
Funny story, when we approached the border at Sarnia Ontario/Pt. Huron Michigan, we handed the immigration officer our passports and answered a few questions, including do you have any weapons? Thinking of the toys in our bag from our dirty minds we just said no.

One of the last questions was the border patrol officer saying  “You mean to tell me you guys drove all the way to Toronto for one night?” After we left Mrs. Swanilla said next time we should be honest and tell them when they ask  “We went to a Swingers Lifestyle club and since Michigan doesn't have any upscale and classy clubs or allow any that are Lifestyle friendly we make trips regularly to Toronto!” 



Then watch the look on their face. I mean we are doing nothing illegal, not bothering anyone and ethically and morally we enjoy ourselves so if the agent had a problem with it, that's on them! Who knows maybe they will go home to their spouse that day and say "honey I have an idea". 

Overall our first Halloween party really was a lot of fun! Everyone looked very sexy and it was such a nice time just being with so many like minded people. It was one of the first times where we weren't nervous and just let things go and realized we are all there for the same thing or some version of the same thing. Everyone we saw was very non-judgmental and we wish there was something similar closer to home. Even 1-2 hours away to make it easier to attend. We have talked about attending again next year or possibly another club. It would be great to line up the Everything to do with Sex Show next year and make it a longer weekend with more fun!

Have any good stories to share about your first time at a lifestyle Halloween party? Please feel free to drop us an email or leave a comment below!


As always, we like to post sexy songs that we enjoy and have gotten us in the mood! This is a great song to have playing while things are heating up!!! Very sensual!